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binging?
i have been practicing macrobiotics for 15 months now. i go in and out of depression, which is most certainly b/c of eating behaviors. i go from being pretty strict to binging on foods--mostly macro, some not so--then, purging. this will last 1-3 days before i "wake up". the depression will last 2 weeks in which i go back to rigidly macrobiotic. i go through resentment, extreme fear in which i feel like i am dying for a few days, then somber and sad, all the while unmotivated and isolative. i come out of it, feel connected and beautiful for a while, rarely more than a few days, then i go back to it. the depression is so thick, i am not sure if i can survive another bout with it. i know it is perfectly connected with purging my food. this i have done for 8 or more years.
anyone have experience with binging on foods, and keeping them, and how long the guilt lasts? i would like to allow myself to go through this, b/c i hear it is natural to overeat on occasion. i would feel much more human allowing this, and feel the depression would not be so intense.
thanks for listening.
Waller
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